I am mine before I am anyone else’s – anonymous
When people hear that you’re a woman living on your own, they give you this sympathetic half smile and puppy dog eyes that says it all – “oh you poor thing, it must be lonely.”
But they could not be further from the truth.
After the breakdown of a long-term relationship, at the age of 27, I moved out on my own for the very first time in my life – and quite frankly – I love it!
At first I can’t deny that the prospect petrified me; I would be a single woman living on my own, more than 20 minutes away from my family and defending myself with all that comes with it – including scary noises and bumps in the night.
But after the first night was over and my daily routine took shape, it dawned on me just how wonderful this new found freedom truly is.
My Space – My Style
When you live with someone else you have to compromise – and I’d spent years of doing just that. Compromising on decorative style, furnishings and features.
I’d done so much compromising in my old house that it didn’t feel like mine.
But here I am in my own space, and I can finally create an environment that I’m happy in.
Of course this includes enough scented candles to heat a small village, but what I have also learned is how much I love colour.
Coming from a place that was muted and simplistic, I now find myself adorning my new home with vibrant colours that uplift my spirit, and put a big smile on my face as soon as I walk through the door. Every little thing in my home has colour, as if it has a life of its own.
In Love with Isolation
Rather than being pestered, demanded of, or feel like I have to be pleasing someone, I only answer to myself. And it’s bliss!
In the crazy, hectic world we live in it’s rare to catch those moments of peace and quiet where you can finally hear yourself think.
As well as embracing moments of silence, I use my time to do all the creative things I’d always managed to find an excuse for.
I read, I write, I meditate, and sometimes I just sit there and listen to the world.
It may sound selfish, but I love this ‘me time’.
We give ourselves to others so freely, yet we offer nothing to ourselves.
Having the space and time for myself, has allowed me to fully enjoy simple pleasures that get surpassed by the rat race.
In my new location I’m lucky enough to live in one the most beautiful historic towns in the UK.
And I take full advantage of my surroundings by going for long walks whenever I feel like it.
Taking in the picturesque views, mesmerising myself over the quaint Georgian houses down cobbled streets, and soaking up every inch of its history.
Going for a walk solo may not sound like everybody’s cup of tea, but thanks to this new habit I’ve realised how curious I am. I love discovering where little paths lead and where small streams start.
If there is one thing that’s not so fun about living on my own, it’s dinner time.
While I adore the fact I get to eat what I want, when I want.
Eating a delicious meal for one is rarely pleasurable.
Which has made me realise how much I love having friends over for dinner and enjoying the experience of cooking for others and seeing them enjoy my food.
Food should always be shared in my eyes, and be served with a good side of company.
The journey that got me to be living on my own may not have been perfect, but I’m a stronger believer that everything happens for a reason.
Without this experience I feel like my confidence wouldn’t have grown and I wouldn’t have realised that I’m a strong independent woman, who can now live my life on my own terms.